This is the 6th day i am living on my own...
i thought i will still be floating up in the air and cant get over it instead of setting down...
BUT guess what, i am stronger than i thought it would be...?
Though when ppl asked me : Jenn, are u okay? or sweetie, are u doing good?
My answer will definitely be : yeah, i am doing good, i am okay...no worries, it's not a big deal.....
( trust me, it's bullshit and i am lying )
BUT in here, a place that i can set my heart at rest without thinking about others's feeling and without wearing a mask...in HERE a place where i could definitely be myself without hiding, honestly confront with my heart and disclose the truth inside of me...
I just wanna be honest to myself and everybody...
yeah, u still possessing my heart now...
thou i am trying hard to make myself being busy with things that i need to be done,
hanging out with my beloved friends to spend my spare time
AND watching football in the night time when i couldnt fall asleep...
AND yet, u will still keep on appearing in my mind and interfere or disarrange my life...
WHY?
i thought i have already resolved and determined enogh to move on... BUT why are u still there?
This is seriously torturing me and killing me...
Whenever i did something which we have also did before, my mind will like automatically keep on rewind-ing and reminded me of the moment we have spent together...
While in the still of the night, when everybody is having their sweet dream, i will always be the only one who's still awake and i could only fall asleep by the dint of the mp3...It's so pathetic man, i am acting like a child who is craving for a bedtime stories before she went to sleep...
Okay, i am tired of this and i am quiting...
No matter in deep down of my heart, it's willings or not...
i HAVE to MOVE ON... physically, mentally and spiritually...
Time is all the factor
AND guess what, may the god bless me ♥
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