Contradiction

I seriously do not have any idea of how to deal with it? Avoiding and hiding the truth or being honest. Sometimes I kinda frustrated of myself for not being true and yet I kinda contribute to the contradiction cause. I always thought that being true is a good thing but what if it might cause conflict.

What I always thought is try to think beyond of that people's shoe. Coz the only way to change thing is by changing urself and not others.

I'm scared that the spaces between us is getting bigger. I started to get apart from u guys for no reason. I prioritize u guys more than anything. Don't you know that? But once I become myself, I get a very bad feedback since then. Tell me what should I do my omnipotent god. I am so lost.